


The Astrophysicist and the ZPM

by ami_ven



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Bedtime Stories, Community: mcsheplets, Fairy Tale Retellings, Fairy Tale Style, M/M, The Princess and the Pea Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 17:49:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7517599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ami_ven/pseuds/ami_ven
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rodney tells their children a bedtime story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Astrophysicist and the ZPM

**Author's Note:**

> Written for LJ community "mcsheplets" prompt #232 "fairy tale"

Once upon a time, there was a kingdom called Atlantis. It floated in a beautiful ocean, in a galaxy far, far away from Earth. Atlantis was a peaceful kingdom and – 

Yes, it’s a city and a kingdom. It can be both. Do you want to hear this story or not?

That’s what I thought.

Now, the kingdom-city of Atlantis was ruled by a queen named Elizabeth, who was very wise and made her kingdom prosper, and her consort, King Radek, who was moderately intelligent and oversaw the technical aspects of their city. They were assisted by the queen’s younger brother, Prince John, who was the bravest knight in the realm and always – 

What? No, of course this is not a story about your father. John is a very common name. You were the one who demanded that I tell you an _entirely new_ story, you can’t expect me to come up with names on top of all that.

Now, where was I?

Oh, yes – The prince was not only brave, if more than a little reckless, but he possessed a magic that allowed him to operate the city’s magical defenses. Not that it was actually _magic_ , it was just an advanced – 

All right, fine. For the purposes of this story, there can be magic, which is entirely fictional and not in any way based on any persons, living or dead.

Now, Atlantis was a prosperous kingdom. Prince John was very busy, going on trading missions for the queen, visiting their allies, exploring new worlds. But he was lonely, too. He had very good friends in the city, but he had no one to really share his life with.

There were several neighboring kingdoms with beautiful princesses, and although the prince considered a marriage of alliance, John wanted to marry someone who loved him for himself, not as the prince of Atlantis. As time went by, his sister, the queen, grew worried for him, and began inviting potential suitors to Atlantis. Not just the princesses from the other kingdoms, but beautiful, brave and brilliant people of all kids.

One after another, they spent the night in the palace’s large guest bedroom, and each morning, the prince himself would knock on their door to wake them. And though each princess, noble or artisan tried to be at their most charming, after each third day, the prince would only smile politely, thank them, and arrange for them to travel home.

What? Yes, all of the princesses were beautiful. It’s a prerequisite to being a princess. And even if she wasn’t born conventionally beautiful, they have all kinds of people to make them beautiful. And the nobles were fairly attractive as well, and the artisans were – but that has absolutely no bearing on our story, except for the fact that none of them were able to hold Prince John’s attention.

Then, very late one night, the prince was walking a patrol of the city when the stargate activated. John hurried into the control room just as the wormhole was established, and a moment later, an IDC came through, marked urgent – from Earth.

“Let them through,” ordered Prince John.

Not a moment after the shield deactivated, a man fell through the stargate. He was soaking wet, and got shakily to his feet when John helped him up.

“Are you all right?” the prince asked.

“No thanks to you,” the man snapped. “A moment later lowering your shield and I could have drowned!”

“We shall endeavor to be faster, in the future,” said John. “Was there anyone else with you?”

“No, I was quite alone. No need for a dashing rescue, sir knight.”

“I’m the prince, actually,” said John. “And you are…?”

“Rodney,” said the man. “ _Prince_ Rodney, of Canada. I’m –”

What? No, of course not! What did I just tell you about names? Now, be quiet and listen to the story.

Queen Elizabeth arrived at that moment, looking regal even in her dressing gown. She had called for the court doctor, who quickly determined that Rodney was unhurt, just wet and tired. He had been on the planet collecting data from the weather station there – he was a scientist as well as a prince – when a sudden rain storm had flooded his worksite and he’d had to escape to Atlantis.

The queen called for the guest room to be prepared, while the visiting prince took a warm bath, and – 

Yes, a bath. They’re very relaxing. Stop interrupting.

Prince John showed Rodney to the guest room himself, promising to return in the morning. Rodney climbed into bed, exhausted, but soon found that he was unable to sleep. He also had the magical ability to operate the old equipment, and he could sense something nearby. After a while, he got up and began to search for it. By dawn, he hadn’t found anything and went back to bed, catching another few hours’ sleep before there was a knock on his door.

“What?” he demanded, to Prince John.

John grinned at him, and led him to the kitchen for breakfast. They talked as they ate, beginning with normal small talk, but quickly moving to other topics. John was smarter than his hair would lead people to believe – 

No, I told you this wasn’t about your father. Any resemblance is just a coincidence. Can I continue?

Thank you.

The second night, Prince Rodney was again escorted to the guest room, but this time he started searching immediately for the technology he had sensed. After more than an hour of careful searching, he discovered that his bed was not just a bed – it was a piece of old technology. It was carefully hidden, but Rodney was very smart, and always carried a small toolkit with him, even when he’d been on the run from a flash-flood.

He was able to open the device, and started to examine the crystals inside. It wasn’t working, but Rodney was sure that he could fix it. He worked all night, testing the crystals with the small computer in the guest room, only stopping when the dawn light peeked through his window, catching barely an hour of sleep before Prince John came to knock on his door.

“Good morning,” the prince said, and Rodney scowled at him.

“Yes, yes, is there food?”

And again, they spent breakfast talking, which led to a game of chess, then several more games, as the two men were so evenly matched that they each won by the narrowest margins. John asked Rodney about his work with the old technology, listening intently to his answers and offering his own, surprisingly insightful, comments. 

What? No, this story isn’t about me _or_ your father. Have you not been listening? Now, stop interrupting, both of you.

As I was saying…

It was late when Rodney retired on the third night, but he went straight to work on the bed-device, realigning the crystals and reconfiguring the control panel. He was so intent that he didn’t notice the approach of dawn, sliding the last crystal into place just as there was a knock on the door.

“Go away!” he yelled, but the door opened.

Prince John came in, smiling, “Good morning, Rodney,” he said. “I see you’re—”

He broke off abruptly as he walked near the bed and it lit up bright blue.

“I didn’t…” Rodney began, but then he saw that John was grinning. “Um, surprise?”

“You fixed it,” John breathed. “Come with me.”

He grabbed Rodney’s hand, tugging him out of the room and into the corridors, all the way through the city to the queen’s office.

“John?” she asked.

The prince was still grinning. “Rodney fixed the bed,” he told her.

“I—” Rodney began, then sighed. “I did, your majesty. I apologize for not asking permission, but I have long been fascinated by the old technology and could not help trying to repair it. And, um, I also apologize if I might have been, well, less than cordial in our interactions. But I’ve been up all night, the past three nights, so…”

“Forgiven, of course,” she said, smiling. “Oh, John, I’m so glad you found him.”

“Found who?” asked Rodney.

The queen frowned. “John?”

“I…” said the prince, rubbing the back of his neck. “I kinda forgot to ask.”

What? I was just getting to that. You asked for this story, let me remind you, the least you can do is be patient while I’m telling it.

Thank you.

What the prince had forgotten to explain was that the guest room had been a test – each princess, noble or artisan had been bright and cheerful each morning because they hadn’t found the device in the bed, or if they had, they hadn’t tried to use it. And what he’d forgotten to _ask_ was that he wanted Rodney to stay with him in Atlantis… if Rodney agreed.

Well, of course he did. The entire city was based on the old technology, how could be pass up an opportunity like that? And, well, he did like John, very much.

What? It took longer than three days, but John and Rodney did fall in love. They were married in Atlantis’s Gate Room, and they lived happily ever after.

Mostly happily, I mean. They did fight sometimes, because that’s what normal people do, but they loved each other enough that they could never stay mad at each other. Except when one of them was lurking in dark corners while the other told bedtime stories to their ungrateful children.

Seriously, Sheppard, you can come out now, they’re asleep.

I was not a princess! _You_ try coming up with a brand-new fairy tale, Colonel Smart-Mouth, and see what happens.

Well, maybe we _are_ living happily ever after. C’mon, there’s a non-Ancient tech bed waiting for us… 

THE END


End file.
